BARDCORE

by Library Bards

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Insane Ian The Bards first album is nerdy fun at it's best. Catchy vocals, hilarious lyrics, and an unabashed sense of nerdiness makes this album and their live shows a joy to behold. Favorite track: Regeneration.
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about

The Library Bards bring you their first full studio album! Complete with parodies of Top 40 hits (of any decade), the Bards will bring you on a journey through Fandoms you won't soon forget!

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released March 1, 2017

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Library Bards Los Angeles, California

The Library Bards are a nerd parody band consisting of Bonnie Gordon (ABC's The Quest, R. Mika in Street Fighter V) and Xander Jeanneret (TBS' King of the Nerds). They take Top 40 hits and transform them into the nerdy versions they should have been in the first place! With their catchy tunes and nerdy lyrics, the @LibraryBards will be bringing you into the #BardLife in no time! ... more

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Track Name: All About That Space
All About That Space!
(Parody of “All About That Bass” by Meghan Trainor)
Because you know I’m all about that space, ‘bout that space
No Tribbles.
I’m all about that space, ‘bout that space
No Tribbles.
I’m all about that space, ‘bout that space
No Tribbles.
I’m all about that space, ‘bout that space

Yeah, it’s pretty clear, I ain’t no size 2.
But I can ‘Slave Leia’ like I’m supposed to do.
And my ship goes zoom zoom into the deep space
Boldly searching for new life and new races

I see your laser beams workin, that zap and zop!
We know that Han shot first!
Come on, George Lucas, stop!
If you got ensign duty – just don’t wear red
‘Cause every inch of you’s a target
from your feet up to your head

Yeah, I love me some Star Wars, some Star Trek, and Firefly
(Serenity)
StarGate, and Farscape, and Red Dwarf, and Babylon 5!
Battlestar G., Lost in Space, Lexx, and Doctor Who
(Doctor Who)
Move along if you don’t think that bow ties and
fezzes are cool!

Chorus

They’re bringing Star Wars back!
But it’s with Disney so it might be crap!
Can my Disney prince be Captain Jack?
‘Cause I’m here to tell you,
every inch of him is perfect
from the bottom to the top.

Yeah, I love me some Star Wars, some Star Trek, and Firefly
(Serenity)
StarGate, and Farscape, and Red Dwarf, and Babylon 5!
Battlestar G., Lost in Space, Lexx, and Doctor Who
(Doctor Who)
Move along if you don’t think that bow ties and
fezzes are cool!

Chorus
(Make it so)
(Earl Grey, hot! The TARDIS!
Captain Jack my Disney Prince)
Track Name: Gandalf
Gandalf
(Parody of "Shake It Off" by Taylor Swift)
I always want to eat, I'm short with hairy feet
That's what people say, mmm-mmm
That's what people say, mmm-mmm

I'm going on a Quest, With 13 dwarves with hairy chests
At least, that's what people say, mmm-mmm
That's what people say, mmm-mmm

I'm disapproving, can't stop, won't stop moving
This journey's got me bruising, I'm falling behind
But "It's gonna be alright."

Cause it's time to leave the Shire
Find a ring that's forged from fire,
With a wizard I admire
Named Gandalf! Gandalf!
Yeah, we're walking every day,
The dragon Smaug we're gonna slay,
Led by a wizard wearing grey,
Named Gandalf! Gandalf!

The Goblins filled with rage!
And the Elves they never age
I’m trying to stay alive, mmm-mmm
From Armies 1, 2, 3, 4, 5! mmm-mmm
Meeting Smaug all on my own (Smaug all on my own)
I'm running to and fro (running to and fro),
But this ring won't let me show, mmm-mmm
And that's what they don't know, mmm-mmm

Goblins are showing, Sting can't stop, won't stop glowing
But I keep on knowing in my mind
That "It's gonna be alright."

Chorus

(Spoken)
Just think while you've been getting down and dirty
in the Misty Mountains of the Earth that is Middle,
You could've been getting down to this. Sick. Riddle!

I’m a hot mess
‘cause of my Precious -
It’s the One True Ring,
That no one’s gonna take!
But answer now, if you dare:
What’s one more than a pair
and will musically delight you for comedic sake?

Library Bards?
Chorus
(Repeat)
Track Name: Finn and Poe
Finn And Poe
(Parody of “Ex’s and Oh’s” by Elle King)
Well, there was an ace pilot for the new resistance
He had a rolling droid where he hid the new plans
Whoa, and then he let him go

Now, a Stormtrooper’s fighting in the name of new law,
He got blood on his helmet, didn’t like what he saw,
Hey, hey, so he made a getaway
One, two, three, you gotta listen to me,
You better give the audience what they wanna see,
It’s not a phase, they can really save the day,
They always wanna tease, but you’ll never make ‘em gay.

It’s Finn and Poe, oh, oh, we want, please
with lightsabers and X-Wings
a ship for all!
Can’t let it go
It’s Finn and Poe

Found the leather jacket stuck in the sand,
Wore it through the movie to remember his man
My my, but Poe was still alive (spoilers)
Met back at the base, rekindled the bro-
mance when he bit his lip sayin’ hello
You know, that's how the story goes

One, two, three, you gotta listen to me,
You better give the audience what they wanna see,
It’s not a phase, they can really save the day,
They always wanna tease, but you’ll never make ‘em gay.
It’s Finn and Poe, oh, oh, we want, please
with lightsabers and X-Wings
a ship for a-ah-all
Can’t let it go
It’s Finn and Poe, oh, oh, we want, please
with lightsabers and X-Wings
a ship for a-ah-all
Can’t let it go
We want Finn and Poe.

One, two, three, you gotta listen to me,
You better give the audience what they wanna see,
It’s not a phase, they can really save the day,
They always wanna tease, but you’ll never make ‘em gay.
It’s Finn and Poe, oh, oh, we want, please
with lightsabers and X-Wings
a ship for a-ah-all
Can’t let it go
It’s Finn and Poe, oh, oh, we want, please
with lightsabers and X-Wings
a ship for a-ah-all
Won’t fly Solo
We want Finn and Poe.
Track Name: Pokeball
Pokéball
(Parody of “Wrecking Ball” by Miley Cyrus)
When I turned 10,
I made new friends
So cute, Monsters pocket-sized.
Across the path, out in tall grass
I froze, meeting both your eyes

Don't you ever say I chose “run away”
I will always choose you.
I can't win a badge, fighting for romance,
I’m not your Pikachu

He threw me like a Pokéball,
Reset my heart like Missingno.
All I wanted was to catch them all
All you ever did was transfer me
Yeah, you, you transferred me

My Poliwhirl used Defense Curl,
Your moves, are super effective.
Made holes so big, no need for Dig
Wait, are you a boy or a girl?

Don't you ever say I chose “run away”
I will always choose you.
I can't be the best, not like all the rest,
You teach me, I’ll teach you

Chorus x2

I defeated the Elite Four
Became the Gym Champion
But you told me to capture more
I guess I should've used Harden
I’ll never see you evolve
You were candy that was so rare
I should've used a Masterball

Don't you ever say I chose “run away”
I will always choose you

He threw me like a Pokéball,
Reset my heart like Missingno
All I wanted was to catch them all
All you ever did was transfer me
He threw me like a Pokéball, (Pokéball!)
Reset my heart like Missingno. (Missingno.!)
All I wanted was to catch them all (Catch them all!)
All you ever did was transfer me (Yeah, I’m candy!)
Yeah, you, you transferred me
Yeah, you, you transferred me
Track Name: Accio
Accio
(Parody of “Geronimo” by Sheppard)
Can you feel it?
‘Cause it's coming back, we can see it.
With a quick wrist flick,I can see you
Casting a Summon Charm!

If you’ve lost it, you just take command,
and believe it, with your wand in hand,
now you’re waiting,
because you’ve cast that Summon Charm:

We’re sayin’ Accio!
Say Accio! (Repeat)

Can you see muggles? Wands away!
(Repeat)
We‘re sayin’ Accio!

When it’s cold out, and you’ve got no choice
you can cast it, using just your voice.
We can make some heat, casting a Fire Charm!

So Say Incendio! (Repeat)
Can you see muggles? Wands away!
(Repeat)

Well there’s far more spells than the movies tell,
you can learn them well
(More than Stupefy or Lumos)

So it's here we say, the books are the way,
that magic’s portrayed (Expecto Patronum)

You won’t come to harm, get your NEWT in Charms.
you’ll learn to disarm (That’s Expelliarmus!)

And with old Flitwick, you’ll learn double quick.
that swish and flick
Wingardium Leviosa!
(It’s LeviOsa, not LeviosA!)

So Say Accio!
Say Incendio!
Say Engorgio!
Say Relashio!
Say Confundo!
Say Reducto!
Say Silencio!

Can you see muggles?
Wizardry! (x3)
(Where is it?)
In the Ministry!
Track Name: Geeky Girl
Geeky Girl
(Parody of “Barbie Girl” by Aqua)
(Hey Girl!
Hey Boy!
You wanna play with my toys?
Sure, Boy!
Too bad!)

I’m a geeky girl, in a nerdy world
Games and plastic, it’s so tragic
I wanna play with toys, but they’re all for boys,
Imagination, but no representation

Come on Hasbro, don’t be shallow!

Chorus

I’m a strong character in a fantasy world
kicking butt, fighting crime, flying spaceships

They won’t sell, I can tell, give me muscles and pain,
We need more manly men, we don’t need tits

Where’s Gamora? Where is Rey? With no Black Widow,
there’s no Avengers

Ooh

Chorus

In your slim leather suits, you are only a tease
I need tough action stars, not you whiney ladies

We can fight, save the day
But we never can play,
Only doll I can find is Slave Leia

Where’s Gamora? Where is Rey? With no Black Widow,
there’s no Avengers.
Where’s Gamora? Where is Rey?
What do you mean, it’s to avoid spoilers!?

Chorus (Repeat)

(Aw, it looks like you’re having so much fun!
No toys for you!
Aw, corporations!)
Track Name: Black and Red
Black And Red
(Parody of “Zombie” by The Cranberries)

Another Deadpool’s walking over, he’s dressed in Cosplay.
And his mask, it causes silence. He hates it, but he can’t say.
And I see, it can’t be, it’s another Harley
Black and Red, Black and Red, she’s exposing!
With their swords, and their bombs, and hammers, and their bombs,
Black and Red, Black and Red, they are posing!
Black and Red, Black and Red,
Deadpool and Harley, Harley-eh-eh-eh
This Cosplay’s dead. That’s what I said.
Deadpool, and Harley, Harley-eh-eh-eh

(Chimichanga)

Another fanboy’s broken heart is now broke-er.
Because the Harley on the Con floor has a Joker.
It’s the same color scheme since the 1990’s.
Black and Red, Black and Red, they’re still posing!
With their swords, and their bombs, and hammers, and their bombs,
Black and Red, Black and Red, The Con’s closing!
Chorus
(Mister J)
(Shut up, Harley!)Ryan Reynolds (Repeat)
(He’ll make it better)
Track Name: Princess is Captive (feat. Breakmaster Cylinder)
Princess Is Captive (Ft. Breakmaster Cylinder)
(Parody of “Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons)

I am a part of the Triforce
I wipe my brow and I set my course across the land of Hyrule.
Woah!
I'm breaking blocks, collecting life,
then checking out all your plumbing pipes.
It’s a me, Super Mario!
Whoa!
I power up, I see the gold coins glow
Now to the castle I go!
Welcome to the Wii Age, to the Wii Age
Welcome to the Wii Age, to the Wii age
Whoa, My princess is captive! Princess is captive!
Whoa, My princess is captive! Princess is captive!

Punch question marks, looking for a rose, so I can shoot fire at my foes
I’m wearing red, ‘cause I’m Italian. (Obviously) Whoa!
Wearing green, like Peter Pan, look like part of an Elven clan
The game should be called “The Legend of LINK!”

Chorus

Make sure I have hearts, so I don’t die
Mushrooms work too. Keepin me high!

Chorus (Repeat)
Track Name: Regeneration
Regeneration
(Parody of “My Generation” by The Who)

Daleks try to shoot me down
(Talkin’ ‘bout Regeneration)
Just because I get around
I don’t look the same, or so I’ve been told
‘Cause I’m over 9 centuries old!

It’s Regeneration!
It’s Regeneration, baby!

TARDIS will up and fade away
(Talkin’ ‘bout Regeneration)
It’s bigger on the inside, they always say
Flying through time to any location
But a Time Lord’s life has no vacation

It’s Regeneration!
Regeneration, baby!

Armed with paper that’ll change your mind
(Talkin’ ‘bout Regeneration)
A good companion’s hard to find
I wish this thing worked like it should
But this damn screwdriver doesn’t work on wood!


It’s Regeneration!
It’s Regeneration, baby!

Just got hit with a killing blow!
(Talkin’ ‘bout Regeneration)
Hearts are racing and I start to glow
Starting to feel a strange sensation
Must be time for Regeneration!

Yeah, It’s Regeneration!
Track Name: Shut Up and Raid
Shut Up And Raid With Me
(Parody of “Shut up and Dance With Me” by Walk The Moon)
No need to reroll stats, you’re just a level three
He said “Don’t hold me back!”
I said shut up and raid with me
This half-elf is your destiny, I said ooh
Shut up and raid with me!

We were playin’ all through night
Our levels soaring up to brand new heights
No need to physically win the fight
Ooh we were bound to game together,
Soul-Bound to game together
Keep safe from harm, you’re just here piggybackin’
He killed a boar and I said: No need to reroll stats
Your level’s fine with me! He asked “Should we attack?”
I said shut up and raid with me! This half-elf is your destiny,
I said ooh, Shut up and raid with me!

A reckless act and a killing spree. Dominating all of the PVP!
We keep it going for a monthly fee
I knew we were bound to game together,
Soul-Bound to game together!
Our avatars, decked out in shiny armor
We backslash waved and he said
No need to reroll stats, your level’s fine with me
We said time to attack, he said “LEEROY JENKINS!”
No need to go play “Destiny”, I said ooh
Shut up and raid with me!

(Come on girl, let’s raid!)

Deep in the raid, our guild is standing ready
We realize this is our last chance!
The boss respawns, we don't know how that happened
Wrote the GM to complain:

(Excuse me, Mr. GM! We got some words for you.
Check the message board. Slidin’ into your DMs!)

Our guild has way high stats, we beat all NPCs
Your game is out of whack,
He said “Shut up and pay the fee!
This game is your reality.”
We said ooh
You’re right, let’s play!
No need to reroll stats
Maxed out our talent tree
Our party’s full of class
We said backslash and dance with me
This world is our reality
I said ooh
Backslash and dance with me!
(Repeat)
Track Name: Buccaneer
Buccaneer
(Parody of “Chandelier” by Sia)
Hearty sirs don't get hurt
Can't feel anything, when will ye learn?
We batten down, batten down

I'm the one for a bar time brawl,
Cannon's blowin' up, swabbin' up the hall,
Ye scurvy dog, scurvy dog,

1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, YAR!
1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, YAR!
1, 2, 3, 1, 2, 3, YAR!

Throw 'em back 'til I lose count

I am the king, I'm a buccaneer, a buccaneer!
I'm gonna live like I have doubloons in my fist
Doubloons in my fist (That means money)
I'm a tough guy when I plunder and smite (he'll plunder you),
a black patch upon me eye (Patches)
I'm gonna drink from me goblet of beer,
from me goblet of beer! (Alcoholics)

But I'm holding onto me knife, sailing seas and wide open skies,
Keep me mug full until morning light,
keelhaul lubbers and murder outright (He'll murder you)
Heave Ho, hearties hold onto your knife,
Won’t go down ‘til we get the prize
Keep my mug full until morning light,
keep my enemies all filled with fright, all filled with fright

Sun is up, hit the crow's nest
Gotta get up now, all hands on deck (All hands on deck!)
Anchors aweigh, anchors aweigh

Chorus

But I'm holding onto me knife, sailing seas and wide open skies,
Keep me mug full until morning light,
keelhaul lubbers and murder outright (Murder, yeah!)
Heave Ho, hearties hold onto your knife, won’t go down
'til we get the prize ('til we get the prize)
Keep my mug full until morning light,
keep my enemies all filled with fright
All filled with fright
(Repeat)

Grab ye lubbers, and fill them with fright! (I think they get it)
Yar har, me hearties, keep your enemies all filled with fright
(No, seriously)
Oh, all my enemies, filled with fright!
(They heard you the first time) YAR!
I need a throat lozenge (Menthol)
Sea spray is hard on the throat.
Track Name: Moon Prism Power
Moon Prism Power
(Parody of “Shower” by Becky G)
When I'm out on a daily adventcha,
runnin’ late, class startin without me
Anytime someone mention a game,
out I'm headin’ with or withoutchya

Whiney might be a word to describe me
All I know is that the stakes are high
With my friends who are here all around me
Using powers from the sky

She is out fighting when you're in bed,
When you wake up, you'll thank her again,
With other scouts, this world she'll defend
Exactly why
I light up from inside, like the 4th of July
Whenever I scream loud, those three words I can shout
I always seem to pose, don't need Tuxedo's rose, I
change into a sailor, and say Moon Prism Power!

La Da Di, La Da Da, La Da Da
say Moon Prism Power!
La Da Di, La Da Da, La Da Da
say Moon Prism Power!

In the name of the moon I’ll be busting
Mars is burning foes like an oven
The Silver Crystal we soon will recover
I will find out I’ll soon be a mother
No, not all I throw
A tiara I let go
I’ve got wands, scepters and powers
And I’ll use them all aglow

Chorus

There ain't no guarantee
But take a chance on me
Punishing evil crime
(say Moon Prism Power!)
And when the times get rough
There ain't no giving up
‘Cause it just feels so right
(say Moon Prism Power!)
(Repeat)

Don't care what others say
In my suit I feel great
For love and justice I~

Chorus
(Prince Darien!
In the name of the Moon, I will punish you! Love and Justice, yeah!)
Track Name: Now You Have The Bridge Spock
Now You Have The Bridge, Spock
(Parody of “Hit Me With Your Best Shot by Pat Benatar)

He’s a real tough Captain with a long history
Of breaking lots of hearts cross the Galaxy!
Gone away, get a team to do it!
That planet’s M Class, let’s beam down to it!

Now you’ve got the Bridge, Spock!
You’re in command, you’ve got the Bridge Spock!
Now you’ve got the Bridge Spock!
Kirk is away!

With your Vulcan Grip and Mind Meld you don’t fight fair.
But with no emotions, you just don’t care.
Now sit down, the Bridge is your domain
‘Til the Captain’s back on the ship again!

Now you’ve got the Bridge, Spock!
The Enterprise is in your hands, Spock!
Yeah, now you’ve got the Bridge, Spock!
Kirk is away!

He’s a half-human Vulcan with a long history
Of solving all our problems logically!
You say that you don’t love, it has no place
But you’re still our favorite officer in Starfleet space

Now you’ve got the Bridge Spock!
But Kirk’s returning to the Bridge Spock!
Your command is at an end, Spock!
Kirk is OK!

Time to beam him up, Scott.
Beam the Captain to the ship, Scott.
It is time to beam him up Scott.
Kirk’s here to stay!
Track Name: Black and Red Epic Version
Black And Red
(Parody of “Zombie” by The Cranberries)

Another Deadpool’s walking over, he’s dressed in Cosplay.
And his mask, it causes silence. He hates it, but he can’t say.
And I see, it can’t be, it’s another Harley
Black and Red, Black and Red, she’s exposing!
With their swords, and their bombs, and hammers, and their bombs,
Black and Red, Black and Red, they are posing!
Black and Red, Black and Red,
Deadpool and Harley, Harley-eh-eh-eh
This Cosplay’s dead. That’s what I said.
Deadpool, and Harley, Harley-eh-eh-eh

(Chimichanga)

Another fanboy’s broken heart is now broke-er.
Because the Harley on the Con floor has a Joker.
It’s the same color scheme since the 1990’s.
Black and Red, Black and Red, they’re still posing!
With their swords, and their bombs, and hammers, and their bombs,
Black and Red, Black and Red, The Con’s closing!
Chorus
(Mister J)
(Shut up, Harley!)Ryan Reynolds (Repeat)
(He’ll make it better)